Choosing the best line at the grocery store and other issues

I have come to the conclusion that I may be smart (I wish!) but that in the grocery store that I have absolutely no ability when it comes to choosing the best line when I need to checkout.

Usually I have too much to go in the Express line (and besides, they seem terminally slow anyway) and I have found that invariably I have something that won’t work on the self-checkout lanes.

I therefore have to use my intelligence to seek out the best lane.  I was talking to Mikey yesterday and I realize why my choice is always faulty.  I am just too logical.  I realized that I scope out the amount of items in the grocery carts of the people in line and use that to judge how long I am going to be there.  The problem is that I never take into account the actual cashier.  The cashier makes the difference, in the end, and can actually take a huge amount of merchandise and zip through it. 

Because of the way that I have chosen, I seem to always get in the wrong line.  I naturally scope out the people in the other lines when I am in line to make comparisons.  I almost always get burned and leave much later than my cohorts.

Because of this, I am working on my new tactic.  Once I choose the line I think is the best, I opt for the other choice.  I will report back as to how this works.  It certainly cannot be any worse than it currently is. 

Has anyone ever noticed that no matter what you tell the checkout person that your request will never be honored? Tell them and/or the bagger to put the “light” stuff in a certain bag you brought in and they will load it to the extent that you need not do your weight routine at the gym.  That seems to happen to me all the time, to me their responsiveness is akin to what I found years ago when I still availed myself of professional hair cutters, ask the stylist to do something and they will generally do their own thing anyway, cutting your hair in some odd style to show their creativity.

One of my biggest grocery shocks was at a local grocery store.  I remember years ago the shock that overtook my whole system when my cart and I started the final approach to the cashier when someone grabbed the cart away from me and started removing things from it.  It took me many visits there before I fully accepted the practice and even embraced it.

I had mentioned in another entry that I need a life, as the saying goes.  Who on earth would ever take the time to think out grocery scenarios!

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